I told a friend of mind that I was only waiting for him to fuck up so I could steal his gorgeous wife and this was his response:
Yes that's likely: "hello? Is that match.com? Well I'm finally rid of my ex. who was a short, fat, unfashionably northern waste of space whose major defining characteristics were having a train-wreck career, depressing taste in music and a drinking problem... So could you send over another one please? But with a smaller dick."
No woman, ever.
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